A MOTHER’S LOVE

The word “Mother” carries a whole range of emotions which communicate the deep bond between a woman and her child. Mother is the person who always dedicates her all to give happiness and prosperity to her child. Since a baby was born into the world, a mother would tirelessly give her baby all the love and protect a baby all through her life. A mother’s love is pure and unconditional. It is the kind of love that makes the world go round. On the occasion of Mother’s Day which falls on 12 August every year, we are proud to bring you the story of four ladies who have expressed her indefinite motherly love to her children. Salute to all mothers and their greatest love of all.

Despite being a troublemaker, Taew was a reasonable kid and was mature for her age. Nid said every time they did something wrong, Taew would be able to solve the problem on her own. She was quite a reliable daughter but what worried her mother was that she was way too shy.

“When she was young, she gave me no clue whatsoever that she would turn into an artist or actor. She was such a shy girl and introvert. When there was any activity, she would hide behind a friend. Somehow, she was often chosen to be a rep to attend those activities. On Teacher’s Day, she’d be a flower tray bearer. On Sports Day, she’d be either a sign bearer or a drum major. She was able to do it but she didn’t want to. What I did was I found a training course to change this behaviour to solve the issue. I wanted her to understand that we all had the right to express ourselves as long as it was proper and didn’t disturb other people. You didn’t have to be shy and keep quiet. I still didn’t get to take her there because she told me that she got this job offer first.” That job was a turning point for Nid and Taew. In the past, she had a negative feeling against the entertainment business but Nid wanted her kid to grow up as a happy adult in the society. Gradually, she changed her point of view and let Taew try it out in this industry with an aim to boost her self-confidence.

“Normally we didn’t watch TV at home so I didn’t know that many people in this circle. I didn’t know any actor and I thought this circle had a way to attract and make people addicted to the world of make-believe. At first, when people gave me their name card asking me to take my daughter to the studio to take a photo, I didn’t budge. Until Taew finished her secondary school education and a scout from Grammy (Entertainment) gave me a name card, I thought I could trust them as Grammy was a big organization. It was a good chance for her to try working so that she could overcome her timidity. So I took her to the photoshoot and left. Before long, they contacted me to shoot a calendar work in Krabi. At first I planned to refuse the offer because the schedule clashed with Sports Day which Taew was supposed to carry the sign or a drum major. However, Grammy was able to rearrang the schedule to accommodate both tasks. When the calendar came out, we saw the photos of children playing in the sea splashing one another. Taew could barely be seen in the photo. (laugh) The second job was even funnier. It was an advert. Taew put on some makeup, got dressed up and was made to hold lots of shopping bags. When we saw the advert, Taew looed as this weeny tiny girl as small as a match and those shopping bags were enlarged. They were much bigger than Taew. We couldn’t help but thinking that why she had to put on a makeup and that they could actually get anyone to hold those bags. (laugh) One thing I have to admit is that Taew was actually able to express herself better. The real purpose that I let her work in this circle was not to prep her up for the acting job or the like. I just wanted her to be more outgoing and this line of work helped a lot especially when she got to star in her first drama series – Narak”

Because we are bonded as mother and child, we can never really let go. At least I am worried if they are happy.
When it comes to their work life, I am not worried at all if they are successful. I’m more concerned about their happiness.

Despite what she told us, she revealed that she initially didn’t want Taew to take the job because she was still a secondary school student and she needed to focus on her study. I was afraid that if she took up acting, it would adversely affect her study. All that changed when she met the producer of Narak drama series who made her look at it in another perspective and it prompted her to let Taew have a try.

“At that time, she had already posed for several adverts and got an offer at Channel 7 to be an in-between programmes announcer giving the audience a brief introduction about what was coming up next. After school when she was done with her homework, she’d to record her announcement work. She did this for a while until Channel 7 team told her that she should start acting. Naturally I told them that I couldn’t allow that because it overlapped with her study schedule. We didn’t sign a contract. Later she switched to Channel 3 and worked there as an announcer until she finished her secondary school education. Chanel 3 offered her a role in Narak drama series saying they wanted her to give it a try. Again I said no to them and studying was cited as reason. Channel 3 team insisted that every child star involved in the project was also students. They also added that these kids when they started working, they tended to be more responsible and improved their grades even. Then I let her have a try for once. If it turned out like what they said, it’d be good for her.” Nid told us about the reason behind her important decision. Little did she know that her decision back then would actually be the beginning of Taew’s journey to the stardom. At that time, she was proud that everything went the way she expected it be when her daughter was capable of finding the balance between working and studying. She performed better in her study as expected.

“After started working, she said it herself that she must finish her homework everyday so that it didn’t pile up and became a burden to finish them during the weekend when she was scheduled to work. I felt that she really understood what I had been telling her that studying was her priority. I told her not to expect that I would have the fortune or wealth to give to my kids. Studying would help them develop themselves, see the big wide world and live comfortably with what they had learnt. They may even be able to support others. Since the weekends were all booked up, she spent the time wisely on weekdays. Knowing that she would not be able to study during the weekends, she paid full attention to the teachers in the class to make up for it. Her grades were remarkably improved.”

For this reason, Nid might have stuck to Taew’s side always but she trusted her daughter because it was clear that she could take care of herself well. Nid gave the credit to Pramandanijjanukroah School where both Tao and Taew went to. She believed that it was the school that instilled them with the sense of discipline and logic. They learned how to respect the rules and be sensible enough to take good care of their own selves.

As a mother, it doesn’t matter if the girls are all grown-ups and know how to take care of themselves, Nid is still worried endlessly. Even now when they are successful in working and private life, her worries are still there. “They may be adults but I’m still worried how they carry themselves and family. When Tao was for her hand to get married, I was stammering because my kid couldn’t even care for themselves. How would she be able to care of others? I even told them to wait a bit more for my girl to grow up but the other side said it’s alright saying he himself would be the one to adjust to her way of life. The truth is I’ve trusted my girls entirely but the fact that they are my children so I can never fully let go of them. It still bothers me if they are happy at least. I don’t dwell on their careers but I’m more concerned about their well-being. To be honest, no matter where they are, even if they are working as a vendor in the fresh market, I don’t care as long as it makes them happy. If they like it, that’s enough for me.

That’s what Nid has hoped for all along. Time has gone on and her little girls are now big girls who enjoy physical and mental well-being. They used to be taken care of by parents and now they switch places. Her two girls are now taking care of their parents. That is the utmost pride for a mother.

“Now they all know how to care for themselves and they even take care of me now. They are now grown-ups who understand how the world goes, understand fellow mankind and be able to find their place in the society happily. Someday when we are gone, there’s nothing to worry about”, she concluded with a smile.

I would explain to them the bad points of what they are doing. I talk to them rationally like I would to an adult.
Never did I raise my voice or ban them from doing something straight away.

Mam, as a mom, went on with a smile about an exception which is overseas studying. Mac has gone to study in the UK on his own since he was 10 and before the end of this year would be the turn for, Kin, her second son aged 9, to go to middle school there. But for Nessie, her youngest and a girl, she’d like to have her close with the family for now. “But Nessie wants to go too so she wonders why all her brothers could go overseas but she couldn’t.” Mam added with a laugh.

With her boys in foreign land far away, Mam are worried naturally as a mother. However, having been very close to all of them since they were born, she doesn’t need to worry much because Mac regularly gives her a call every single day for the past three years of his study in the UK.

“I think keeping a really close relationship with your kids are very important. When you’re close, you get to talk with them constantly and at the same time you could teach them. Mac is quite attached to me. Nowadays, people still tease me how come Mac still calls me 2-3 times a day. The asked if I force him or something. I said never. When he calls, it’s like an attendance check in class. He’d ask if everyone home. Where papa was? What about Kin and Nessie? He even asked about Tony (a puppy), Snow (a stray cat that has taken refuge in their home) or our chauffeur. He’s worried about everyone probably because he’s our biggest boy and we are a very close-knitted family so he is sort of worried about everything and everyone. Every time he calls, he would do this but he wouldn’t say he loves us so or he misses us. No such thing. If he has something he wanna share, he’d tell me. For instance, today the test result is out and he’s got this and that points. The fact that today’s communication is super easy, it doesn’t make him feel that far away from home. Whenever he misses mom, he’d call. By the way, he doesn’t use a cell phone because it’s not allowed so he calls from a public phone booth. It feels good to have him consistently give us a call throughout.” She sounds so fresh when telling us about her adorable boy.

Now that all of her children are still studying, at present Mam regards education as the most important thing. She doesn’t deny that she is like any other mother who expects her own children to give it their best shot when it comes to studying. They are still in their schooldays so they have the duty to study hard.

“For now, there is no need for them to think of other things. Their main duty is just study. Apart from this, they could pay attention to their health and they must exercise to stay healthy. Also they need to learn how to live with the people in the society. They must know how to give and take and be generous with friends. All these, they will learn along the way at school. The most important thing for now, I think they have to prioritise their study without being distracted by anything else. As students, they only have to focus on studying. That’s good enough.” This is what they expect from her kids. For herself, Mam said that she had to a duty to be everything for her children; their friend, their sister, their nanny and a lot more and that she had to give it her best shot too,

“Like I told you earlier, I can do anything for my kids as long as they are the right thing to do. I admit it that I spoil my kids too when I couldn’t help it but I try to keep it at a minimum as much as I can. When they ask for anything that is not so bad or anything that is still in my power to get for them, I’ll get it for them. In any case, I prefer them not to be materialistic. It’d be nice to place an importance on the spiritual side. I often think of my kids having a strong mind and gaining enough strength to live in the world safe and sound. I’ll be and I’ll do everything for them. Whatever they want that is a good thing and that is good for them, if I could find it, I would get them all. I’m ready to make a sacrifice for them always without tiring. I won’t be discouraged and I won’t complain ever.” Her caring eyes and warm smile confirmed us that she certainly can does all that for her children.

Chotika Wongwilas

“Child rearing is an important matter”

Noey – Chotika Wongwilas admitted that what she imagined in her head and what really happened in reality is radically different. It has been two years that pretty actress has taken a hiatus from TV screen to become a full-time mother. She revealed that until her little baby boy – Akin was born, she has never thought that she could possess such a strong maternal instinct. Before getting pregnant, she has already set her mind on raising her own kid but she didn’t think it so far as to leave her career as an actress that she is so fond of for over two years.

“It has always been my intention to take care of Akin myself. The plan was that after getting married, I would have a baby and take up less acting job to spend time with him as much as possible. So far everything went as planned except that I didn’t expect myself to be a full-time mom for almost 10 months. When he started walking, I hired a nanny to help me to avoid any accident that could happen. To tell you the truth, the way I think before and after having Akin is totally different. I’ve never thought that I could be the mother that I am today. When I was pregnant, I already felt that my sense of motherhood was increasing gradually in me. I didn’t feel attacked by this feeling because it wasn’t so sudden. However, when I actually got to see his face, my desire to be a good mother became so strong. I felt this need to be a good mother. At this moment, I could tell you that being a mom is not just monitoring the growth of your child. You would get more mature automatically. Now whenever I want to do anything, I would think and think and think again. Because your sense of motherhood would force you to think in much more details than you would normally do”, added the beautiful actress.

Juggling the roles of an actress, a business woman and a mother at the same time, Noey did her best to allot her time for every part of her life. She chose to her actress career on hold in order to dedicate her time fully for her kid. Her business affair can be handled during free time away from her son. “Doing business today is much easier because mine is an online business. I’m only needed at the office for half a day until noon. The rest of the day is for my son. After my son went to bed at 8 pm, it is time for me to manage my business; checking the online system, checking the accounting documents and the like. I have no problem in managing my schedule. Acting is the job that I love but I’d like to be with my kid more so that needs to be put on hold. When he’s a bit older and turn two the next year, maybe I could come back to do a drama series; the one that wouldn’t take up too much of my time. When he’s bigger, everything might fall into place better than it is now.” Celeb mom told us about how she manages her daily life.

Even Noey tries her best to manage her schedule to make the most of her time with her son, she admits that sometimes something comes up and it affects her time with Akin. Fortunately, she still has her husband, Arm – Chansiri Maneechai and his mom to help out with the baby when she’s all tied up with business engagement. That really put her mind at ease. Not even two years old, Akin is still very much naughty, curious about the world and eager to try everything. This makes her quite worry about him.

These days I arrange the time for Akin to play an iPad after his afternoon nap for 10 minutes
because I understand that there are something useful on YouTube or other social media too.

“We have a strict rule at home that we all must observe. Don’t ever quarrel about how to care for Akin when he’s around. When we’re with him, everyone must be on the same page. Let’s say if I don’t let him play a certain thing, then papa cannot ask why we can’t let him play that in front of him. He can’t just come right in and say let him play. That would confuse him and he’d get the wrong idea. Next time when I scold him for playing, he’d go to his papa or whoever that is willing to please him. I don’t want him to be that kind of brat. So we have this rule that everyone must stick to it; be it myself, his papa, grandmother or nanny. Whenever we disagree, we’ll discuss outside and will not say it right out there and then. We won’t let him know that we disagree. If he knows, he will go to papa when I scold him. Then when papa scolds him, he’ll run to grandmother. That’s not what we want.” That is the agreement of everyone in this family.

For Noey, the issue is not only about all kinds of worry that a new mom has for her boy. The challenge also involvesh how to bring him up in this digital era, especially the problem about the children access to various social media. She is trying to get a hang of it in a sensible manner letting her child expose to it but not too much to the point that he gets addict to them.

“Now Akin also wants to play with a phone or iPad. When he saw other kids play with it, he’d ask to play with them as well. I think it’s normal because he was born in the 4G generation in the age social network. It’s our duty to gradually understand it and as his parents, we are the one who have tell him what he’s allowed to do and what’s not. We have to keep our eyes on him and guide him on the right path. These days I arrange the time for Akin to play an iPad after his afternoon nap for 10 minutes because I understand that there are something useful on YouTube or other social media too. We just have to screen them for him. He should be exposed to something that can enrich his knowledge; children’s songs or clips that recite A B C. Those things can spark his imagination but I don’t let him spend too much time on it. Just 10 minutes per day.”

We can call her the mother who understands the development of her baby and has her own updated way of bringing him up in the modern way. However, as a mother, she hopes her child would grow up in the direction that she’d like to see. She doesn’t hope that he would be talented in every way but if he’d grow up and find happiness in his own way. That alone is enough for her.

“When it comes to expectation, I really believe that every mother and father would love to see a child as this good and happy person. I’d like to see Akin live a happy life, be a confident kid and grow up as this sensible mature person with good thoughts. That’s the most I could only hope for. It’s up to him whether he would be talented or how much he could do. We can only support him as much as we can in the direction that he choose to walk.” Akin’s mother wrapped up our conversation with a smile and the hope for the baby she has been cherished with her own two hands.

Kotchakorn Phuwakul

“If someday we are not here, my children must be able to go on living.”

If anyone mentions Bam Bam – Kanpimook Phuwakul, over half of Thai population and K-Pop disciples worldwide must be more than familiar with this name. He is the one and only Thai member of GOT 7 – the renowned boyband  that is showered with love immensely. However, if we look back to his childhood day, it’s undeniable that he could not have gone this far without the inspiration and support from “Joom – Kotchakorn Phuwakul” who has pushed and egged him on until the day that her son’s dream materialised.

Reflect back 20 years ago – when Bam Bam was just five years old, Phuwakul family had to face with the big loss. His father passed away before his time leaving Joom a single mother of four young children. At that time, it’s hard to believe that a small girl could be tough enough to muster everything in her power to bring up her kids despite all the hardship.

When Bam Bam was debuted, there were problems because he was strongly criticised for talking a lot. People don’t know that he naturally is a talkative person and they thought that he wanted to steal the leader’s thunder.

“Actually when his dad was still around, Beer (Saranchai), Bank (Chindanai), Bam and Baby (Hataichanok) were the brat pack. But the loss of their father was so sudden. It seemed they knew that we were in deep trouble. Plus I also thought that their dad left us so suddenly and I, too, may be so as well. That was why I wanted them all to be able to take care of themselves and be survivors. Suppose, I suddenly leave them, they have to live on one way or the other. Therefore, all of my kids had to pitch in working after school. On Saturday and Sunday, they had to be early birds tagging me along to help me out in the weekend market at the hospital. When we got there, everyone would set up the stall, help me with the selling, packing and closing the stall. If it rained, our merchandise got soaked, we had to wipe them dry after getting home around 10 p.m. or we would not have anything to sell the next day. Actually, there were some relatives who were kind enough and offered to adopt my kids but we wanted to stick together as a family. I kept telling them if we wanted to stay together, we had to keep fighting together and survive this. When they helped me work at the market and met their friends, they couldn’t get embarrassed if they wanted to stay together. Everyone had to work.” Joom talked about her hardship in the past which was one of the hardest challenge she has ever gone through. Despite all that, she was driven to fight and work her way out because of her children.

That time her life each day was difficult, but she still had something as her consolation apart of her children. That was her favourite idols. As Beer, Bank, Bam and Baby grew up, it was the golden days of Taiwan’s F4. Later Korean artists invaded Thailand’s pop landscape. Joom had been there all along as an ardent fan of all those idols.

“I would set whoever that was my favourite idol at the time as an example to guide my boys. For example, Jerry (Jerry Yan – Taiwanese actor) was a nice, polite and responsible actor who respect others. His biography said he used to be poor. Rain (Korean artist), too, used to stay at the orphanage with his brother because their parents got divorced. Before he could make a debut, he had to dance in front of Pak Jin-Young (JYP Entertainment President) countless of times. I told them about this a lot the whole time. I pointed out to them that these idols also went through hard times. Our lives were not as good as that of others then but there was still a chance to make it better if we tried. At first, I didn’t plan for my kid to get into the entertainment industry. I only wanted them to know that we could change our course of life if we set our mind on it. I told them to find what they like to do. When they did find it, just kept on trying and be successful just like them.” She disclosed her inspiration gained from being a keen admirer of famous idols. Those idols didn’t just give her happiness but they gave her kids the dream too.

With that small starting point came an inspiration for her children when Bam Bam was so addicted to games. Joom tried to wean him off games by taking him to see Rain show and showed him that dancing was much better than getting obsessed with playing games and it brought income too. Finally she could turn them around to dancing and she fully supported them. Bam Bam and Baby got a chance to compete and won a prize. Now they could see a way to get paid and help the family for real. Bam Bam went on perform at various events and joined Rain Cover Dance which was JYP audition from Korea and landed the winning prize.

“Actually when they went to the audition, the JYP was also interested in him. There was also a local label expressed the interest so I think it’s better to keep my kid close here in Thailand. Bam Bam at that time was still this little kid and very attached to me. Coincidentally, that Thai label had some problems, his joining this label had to put on hold. Two years had passed before I got a chance to talk to the scout from Korea again. This time I let him make a decision on his own because he earned quite some experience from showcases. I thought if he could survive selling stuff at the market without a complaint, he should be quite used to the hardship. I told him to make a call if he wanted to go. There was no need to feel pressure that he had to go because he has no clue about Korean culture or language. He couldn’t sing Korean songs. All he could was just dancing. If he thought that was too much, he didn’t have to go. He wouldn’t be starved to death in Thailand anyway. He chose to go there saying he wanted to give it a try first. He wanted to make it the way that Rain could and he would like to improve our living here. He said it would speed up the process faster than being a market vendor.”

After letting him walk towards his dream, Joom said she was initially very worried. Every day she would wait for him to give her a call in hope that she could alleviate the trouble and hard times her boy had to face. Until the day that he would debut, she still couldn’t help but worried if the songs would be popular. If not, Bam Bam might feel too defeated to carry on. “When Bam Bam was debuted, there were problems because he was strongly criticised for talking a lot. People don’t know that he naturally is a talkative person and they thought that he wanted to steal the leader’s thunder. He was so hurt by it then and so was I. Would you believe it that both of us talked and cried on the phone almost every night. When I read fans’ comments on social media, I could see that my boy was trolled again. As a mom, all I could do was just consoling him all the way till he got more love from fans little by little.” Joom conveyed her feeling during that time with a trembling voice.

From that day until today, Joom revealed that she has barely expected that Bam Bam would become the heartthrob that fans so loved this much. At this point, he’s walked further than they even hoped for. This is possible because of all the love from fans. She keeps teaching him that he should place importance to fans and be good to them a lot. Fans do not just support Bam Bam but they also share their love and concern to his family.

Before the sun shine into the Phuwakul family, everyone went through all the hardship together; especially the mother who has to foster her kids. Now that all of them could live in comfort without the hardship of the past, Joom decides to lay the last foundation for her kids by opening a family business – B’Chill Café & Restaurant – so that it could support her every kid in the future.

“I’ve tried to set up this restaurant even though I’ve been so exhausted. Bam Bam said, “Mama, why don’t you take a break? Other people’s parents have all taken a rest.” However, I think idols do not last long in the business and my boy hasn’t earned that much as others think. It’s better to earn more from the money that we have now by some kind of investment. In case Bam Bam comes back, he still has this business to fall back on. At first I asked him if should do fashion business because he likes fashion. He said I’m good at cooking because I used to sell rice and curries so he suggested we open food business. At least, that would be the place for fans to hang out and chit chat. Now the restaurant is over two years old. If you ask if we a lot of profit, I’d say not that much. However, it’s the thing that we are good at.” Joom talked about her hope.

As a mother, Joom said she was fortunate that her children were not naughty and they were all good. She said the reason may be because they all learned to live a hard life since young. Beer, Bank, Bam and Baby understand too well of fighting to have a better life and the value of money. Bam Bam is now not only taking care of himself well but he also cares for everyone in the family.” Joom is glad that Bam Bam could help the family the way he had hoped for. I’m really lucky in that.” Her voice was brimming with happiness when sharing with us this story. It goes without a doubt how much she is proud of her son.